Cultivating Wonder & Letting Go

How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?

My journal pages for the "A Year in the Life of an Art Journal" group
I let myself get messy with paint and other materials, I turned dog walking into an excuse to explore and imagine, I treated myself to new tools and materials to court and inspire my muse, I didn’t try to box my creativity in with rules.

What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

I let go of my mother’s house in part because that’s exactly what it was: her house. It was never going to be my house. I choose to think of the house as an article of clothing—a dress with a cut that looked fab on her, was in her favorite color and a material she just couldn’t get enough of. When I put that dress on, it hangs all wrong and, instead of making me feel good about me, it only serves to remind me of her. And I don’t need more memories of my mother:  I am her only daughter, I am raising her son and sharing my home with her dog. I have some of her clothes, her books, her knickknacks, her china, her jewelry, the dress she wore to my wedding. In addition to all that and so much more, I didn’t need to keep her house or to continue to live in it. No matter how many times I walked through that front door, she would never be there to hug me hello. And no amount of paint or redecorating would make it anything but her house—and I’m not even certain that I want it to be anything but that.

So, I let go. “You can never go home again,” that’s what they say, but I don’t know how much truth is in that. I just couldn’t go back to that home again and had to let go in order to make space for the prospect of having and sharing my own home, a place with my own mark, my own memories.

Reverb 10 is an opportunity to reflect on this year past and manifest forward into 2011. This project involves daily prompts throughout the month of December and you can learn more about it—and join!—here and you can follow participants on Twitter using the #reverb10 hashtag.

Thanks for reading!
Angelique

Published in reverb10 on Monday, December 6, 2010
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